Firstly, thank you for your responses to my last post on “An imperfect study on the Psychology of Downsizing“. I am thrilled it has touched so many people. I am amazed that I actually finish a post so I am excited when it touch so many people. Let me explain. Publishing a post is a miracle in and of its self.

First there is an idea. My ideas typically come from:
something that is bouncing around in my mind, or
a funny event or incident
an interesting conversation maybe

From there I ponder the angle and the rough title… Once I have a rough idea of the title I can start writing. The title keeps my writing anchored and on point even though I may take the long way around… which you observably don’t mind if you are still reading…

Thanks for staying with me so far.

When I write a post I am constantly amazed that I actual can finish a train of thought. That is miracle number 1. From there I hand it over to Martin Lloyd or Bill Fuller to proofread. Otherwise, it would never be published. Then finding the photos to use takes time.

Then we get to the publishing phase. Facebook is easy to post to while the blog site consumes a little more time, with image location, size, tags and SEO (Search Engine Optimisation). It is all a learning curve.

So, the fact that it actually gets published at all is miracle number 2.

I never expected to write a “part 2”. So let’s just say that this is miracle number 3. Due to your response to last week’s post and interesting in the Psychology of Downsizing I find myself compelled to write a companion post.

Some truly beautiful things are happening. Thank you for sharing with us your thoughts and actions. Here are a few…

A friend (we did our jewellery apprenticeship together at different firms) said I got him to think about moving his tools on. While another shared a similar story about passing on his tools of trade.

From my own experiences of the Psychology of Downsizing the takeaways are:

1. Pay it forward
2. Create space for a new future
3. Know what you are moving away from and towards

Let me explain…

Couch phycologist (aka me) takeaway number #1. Pay it forward. You create new stories and adventures for others. I am loving living vicariously through others from their actions.

Kevin Wilton made me an awesome pair of earrings.

One-lady, gifted her daughter a china set that matched the teapot she gave her for her 30th birthday present. Now three generations have afternoon tea together off Royal Dolton.

A famous artist (Horacio Cardozo – header image) now has one of my easels and is using it to paint a canvas for our boat’s saloon. So, excited… And yes, we are adding this one painting to our collection.

Some of my original paintings are feature pieces in new homes. Some of our art collection has turned my sister Judi Stewart and a few friends homes into mini art galleries.

Our gorgeous egg chair is now a statement piece in a photography studio and I suspect will be used in many photo shoots.

Two of our bookcases are being set up as a reading corner and loaded with classics and many more of our books are creating more hours of enjoyment for many others…

While it is hard to let it go, receiving a photo of something that was ours, set up in its new home is wonderful. And having them sign up to our blog to follow our journey is the cherry on the top.

So, if you are hesitating, Pay-it-forward and create new stories.

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Some days are easier than others… Because it is hard. It is a fundamental shift in thinking and direction. After all we have been collecting (consciously and unconsciously) to fill our home with things that make us happy. So to be letting the very same items go is challenging.

Having a deadline helps with our motivation. One of my friends commented

“Wow. I am loving your posts and borrowing your tips as we continue the long journey to declutter (with a spare farm and huge shed the lack of imperative is slowing us down a bit, but one day we will have to sell the farm and then what?!!!). Will forward this post also to some of my family who are struggling with prepping for downsizing! Hugs to you….”

I understand the challenge. I can’t decide on what stays or goes so I make a cuppa and the decision waits for another time. Along the same vein, I have ordered a number of times a document shredder bin to clear out old work stuff. I have extended the hire again and again and again.

I enjoying pondering the psychology of downsizing, however that only gets me so far. The following tips have worked for me;

Tip number 1 – Get help. This could be a friend or a professional.

Twice I have had friends help me sort and toss. One girlfriend helped with my professional book collection. About 18 months ago I re-homed many books. And since then I have bought and downloaded the kindle version of my “go to” books.

More recently, another friend helped me with my art equipment. I am pleased to say my books and art equipment I have not added to either collection.

In each instance we came up with some rules before we started and then they kept me focused on the rules. It was awesome and fun. And I did not need counselling afterwards. I have to admit I have still to sort out the paper from the office. And past moves tells me that is always the last to go.

I am also following the lovely Virginia Wells, A professional organiser and founder of The WellSorted Group – Declutter and Organise Your Home. I have enjoyed her posts and her daily challenge. There are a few things I am struggling to let go of. Little things and so I am engaging her for a personal session to help me part with the little things… Perhaps I will write about that separately.

Couch phycologist takeaway number #2. Create space for your new future. Past or current possessions will keep you anchored to where you are now. Let go and make space for your new future. Your new adventure or life stage.

In our case our possessions are changing:
A new ratio of high heels / flats in my wardrobe (more flats)
A new ratio of vehicles / sailboats (the dinghy is a little sail boat)
Hard copy books to ebooks
And a new collection of sheets and lines (or ropes as they are called) for all sorts of purposes

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To wrap it up and reach my third takeaway… Talk about what you would like to do. Our journey started with conversations. We started talking years ago about what retirement looks like. We thought it would be a batch (beach shack) by the sea with a boat. As life events unfolded, our conversations continued and evolved, finding new ways to learn, understand and accommodate each-other’s needs and interests.

I suggest you start talking with each other. We have had people say to us, I would love to live on a boat. While their partner has said, I could not do that… Find the comprise for each. Book a holiday and go sailing. Trust me hiring someone’s else’s boat is heaps cheaper, Please, trust me on that one.

Ask yourself, what would you like to do when the kids finish school, uni etc. And before they have their own kids.

What do you want to do when you retire? Why wait? Start doing it now. What’s holding you back?

When Martin and I met, I had a long list of things I wanted to do written with liquid chalk on the glass sliding door of my bedroom cupboard. The list included local travel and overseas travel. I always had my next adventure planned (or a couple of options). I had a short list and possible dates ready. And when I returned from the current adventure I could to start thinking about the next, which one when etc. Otherwise it was too depressing to go back to work. Even though I loved my clients and my work. I always knew what I wanted to do next…

Adopting these strategies and building your “retirement possibilities” means you will know what you are moving away from and what you are moving towards.

And that is leads me to…

Couch phycologist takeaway number #3. Know what we are moving away from and towards.

One of the most compelling reasons we decided to move aboard and start our adventures earlier, is we want to do it while we can. In the last two weeks we have had one friend pass away after living with cancer with 17 years and another friend pass after having a stroke on Tuesday and life support being switched off on Thursday. You never know what will happen and when.

What are your retirement possibilities? What are you waiting for?

#Ilovesailing #Whatareyouwaitingfor #liveyourlife #downsizing #payitforward #Createspace

I am sure there will be a third post on “The Imperfect study of the Psychology of Downsizing”. As I said previously, I have been amazed at the response to these posts on the Psychology of Downsizing. I encourage you to start your own conversations with your family and friends. It will make it easier to take incremental steps towards your new future.

Stay tuned.