Learnings from the week that was…

While I am calling this post learnings from the week that was, I really feel as if it is confessions from the week that was. My coaching clients will understand this and hopefully laugh as they read this.

I have spent the week on our 34 ft Duncanson “Phoenix 7” yacht with a view to write. Precisely, what am I writing you ask. I am writing my book, “Confident Conversations, Preparing Managers for Difficult Conversations” and about 75% there. It is the last 25% that I am wrestling with to get it to a finished draft by a certain date…

Focusing has been a struggle (on the book that is)…

The last couple of weeks I have been grappling with this.

I was listening to a Her Business podcast where Suzi Dafnis talks about being the Australian distributor for Richard Kiyosaki author of “Rich Dad, Poor Dad” confesses that his book is not a literally master-piece. I have taken courage from learning that fact. He freely knowledges that it could have been much better written. However, the concept and the content are what made it a best seller, over and over again.

I also have taken courage of my fellow mentors Heidi Denning author of, “Her Middle Name is Courage”, and Carolyn Stevens author of, “Confident, Candid and Courageous” And, they have insisted I give myself permission to write a “crappy first draft”. So, my plan was to have my crappy first draft finished by 9th October.

This week did not go to plan at all with numerous challenges over the first couple of days.

Notwithstanding… This is the third time I have locked myself away for a week to write. I should be getting better at this not worse.

The first writing retreat (2014) was not bad… I was scared to write… I went away with two girl-friends both brilliant writers…

Budding authors take note. What I learnt from my first attempt at locking myself away was to arrive a day earlier and get set-up. Get your space set-up, do your shopping, have a meal plan organised and set-up the day before. On my first writing retreat at Kingscliffe, I arrived on Monday and I really was not set-up in my environment until Monday evening. And then I did not start on my plan until Tuesday morning. I was not writing until well into Tuesday afternoon. By the time I was on a roll it was Friday lunch time and my husband and girlfriend’s husband and daughter were joining us at the beautiful Kingscliff for the weekend. They decided to knock of work earlier Friday and arrived mid-afternoon. Now it was only really 2.5 effective days writing.

Writing retreat number two (2017)… It was brilliant.

I flew to Vanuatu Tuesday-to-Tuesday then had a strategy session with Suzi Dafnis and Michelle Falzon on the Friday.

I wrote my plan on the Sunday / Monday I landed in Vanuatu on the Tuesday and stayed at the lovely Barrier Beach resort and wrote. Leaving the resort the whole trip was not an option. It was a small resort only 6 fares at the time. It now has more fares… And I executed my plan… A cyclone and relocation in the week did not deter me… I am always telling my clients to “plan to prepare”. I was super happy…

My days in Vanuatu started with a walk along the beach and a paddle. Then breakfast followed by a number of hours writing. Lunch followed and another walk and paddle and more writing. Diner I relaxed and enjoyed the company of my fellow travellers. In fact, most people were curious about my book and were asking me questions each night. It was like I had my own personal cheer squad. I made a very good friend who has since come to visit me from Switzerland.

I came back to Australia and work got really busy… It stayed super busy for about two years and my book was put on the back burner.

Writing retreat number three (last week)… I wished I had paid more attention to the lessons from retreat number 1.

I had a plan, but it was not current. Not front of mind and not reflecting where I was at with my thinking. I should have updated my plan before I jumped on Phoenix. I also did not set my daily priorities like I did in my second retreat (and every week of the year). And each day I decided on single priority for the next day. I let myself be distracted by everyday things. And other things I wanted to write. Other issues I have been trying to put to bed…

I am pleased I tackled two of those issues and they are put to bed. (They took much longer than I could have ever imagined).

But, I did not stick to my plan. Now my clients are smiling… I can hear you telling me my own words, “Plan to prepare!” Yes, I know.

What I know about myself is I’m normally very disciplined.

It surprised me to step out of my normal routine where I am disciplined, and to find that I was not disciplined on this trip.

Now for my learnings!!!

I love the work by James Clear on his research into discipline and habits and love his very practical approach to disciplined planning and tracking. It sets the scene for my learnings.

I want to share an extract from Twyla Tharp audio book, “The Creative Habit” that James Clear introduced me to. Lessons from Twyla Tharp an internationally recognised dance choreographer.

“I begin each day of my life with a ritual,” she writes. “I wake up at 5:30 A.M., put on my workout clothes, my leg warmers, my sweatshirts, and my hat. I walk outside my Manhattan home, hail a taxi, and tell the driver to take me to the Pumping Iron gym at 91st street and First Avenue, where I work out for two hours.

“The ritual is not the stretching and weight training I put my body through each morning at the gym; the ritual is the cab. The moment I tell the driver where to go I have completed the ritual.

“It’s a simple act, but doing it the same way each morning habitualizes it—makes it repeatable, easy to do. It reduces the chance that I would skip it or do it differently. It is one more item in my arsenal of routines, and one less thing to think about.”

For me that one good decision a day that leads to success comes from my plan… It is the ritual at the end of the day to prepare for the next day… and know exactly what my priority is. If I do this then I am on fire…

The other takeaway for me this week (besides Chinese, that is) came from two directions. Same message but two sources.

The first, my client Jackie told me about the book, “The Third Space, using life’s little transitions to find balance and happiness” by Adam Fraser. I bought the e-book and I’m working my way through it. It talks strategies to step from the first space (where you are now) to the second space (where you are heading) and he calls the transition space your third space…

I was letting my first space dictate my second space…

The same point was come home to me after I watched two interviews with Nat Fyfe, the 2019 AFL Brownlow Medallist. He is humble and inspirational, referred to the third space (while not by name) a number of times. Also, he mentioned the space between the last game (regardless of whether it was a good or poor performance) and the next game does not affect the way he prepares for the next game.

Similarly, the space between plays on-field doesn’t affect the way he prepares for the next play.

He confesses that he is not a morning person, yet he has earned how to use routine and time for himself to better plan for the day ahead.

All of these resonate with me. So now, I need to take these learnings. And revisit my plan to finish my crappy first draft… no excuses…

Plan to prepare!!!

You just might get it… take caution.

I decided I wanted to remove all distractions this week and focus on finishing my book. I had not planned for being disconnected from wifi…

Going into lock down was the plan. The chosen venue for lock down was our boat “Phoenix 7” a 34 ft Duncanson sail-boat.

The reno work on Phoenix is more or less finished. Martin and I spent all day Sunday cleaning her so I could spend the week writing… Starting Monday…

Best endeavours. 

Queue music… Van Morrison singing, “Days like this.”

For this type of trip, I like to pack everything the day before especially when I want to write for 5 days.

Note: to other budding writers. Do everything the day before including your writing plan so you can start writing very first thing in the morning.

Well, packing did not just include clothes and food for a week. It included linen, soft furnishing’s and dining table cushions, shower curtain etc, etc, etc as we had taken just about everything off the boat.

After packing and shopping I decided to get the dogs washed professionally as I was running out of time and it would make it easier to unload the car and load the boat without my adorable munchkins at my feet, or more precisely trying to sniff out whether I’d actually remembered to pack anything resembling food for them.

I had the lovely Mitch (who’s brilliant work on our boat was covered in another post) and Virginia coming by to drop the second key off and I said I would give them lunch and Mitch wanted to check something.

Here I must issue a warning to any Celebrity Chefs or even just plain Chefs out there who are about to read this; I swear that I am normally a highly organised gal who seldom lapses into the sort of stupidity that you are about to read off. What went wrong yesterday, I fail to fully comprehend!”

The lunch plan was roast chook from our local butcher (very yummy) and my signature salad.
Ingredients:
~ Celery finely sliced
~ Pears finely sliced
~ Slivered almonds toasted
~ Feta cheese and a drizzle of the oil the feta is marinated in…

Well, I picked up the chook on the way. Tick.
I had forgotten to pack the:
~ almonds from home
~ pear and the feta from the corner store (which is right next door to the butcher)

I have started cutting up the celery before I realised this. And, I was using a normal knife as I had forgotten to pack the chef knifes… Fortunately I did not get too far before I realised that I did not have most of the ingredients.

Fade music (Van Morrison)

Queue music, Bobby McFerrin singing “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.”

Lunch became, roast chook… and hummus with celery and biscuits… Lol

After a late lunch we went to buy anchoring lights for the boat. We now have the required lights we need to anchor over-night on our trip next weekend.

Just before going to the Chandler I also learnt from a client an automation was not working as expected… and this was a problem. Mitch left and I went to pick up the dogs.

Back on the boat and I went to plug in my phone to hotspot it to fix the automation and my phone was down to 7%… And the phone charger was not working… Sorry Mitch the cigarette charger point gave up… No way of charging my phone…

A quick note to my client while I still had some charge and hotspot… Followed by a quick call to my husband saying phone about to die 2%…

By now its dinner time…

The comedy of errors continue…
I went to cook green prawns stir fried with ginger, coriander, beans, capsicum and nuts…

I pulled out the green prawns (which I had had in the freezer at home) and opened the bag, only to discover they were prawn shells that had not made it to bin… LOL

I had a lovely vegie stir fry… Followed by a shower and went to bed by 8pm. 

Lights out – I woke 12 hours later. 

This morning I believe I have rectified my comedy of errors I have now got knives and a few other essential things and a power source for my phone.

Take Two… Productive work occurring…

Queue music, Pharrell Williams singing “Happy.”

#Dayslikethis #Dontworrybehappy #Happy #Investinginme